So, I suppose I'll start with my weekend, a very good place to start. Friday night I met up with my friend Chloe, trudged through endless traffic, and finally arrived at my bro-cuz, Kyle's place. I wanted to play match maker with these two for a bit because well, Chloe loves Jews, and Kyle is one cool Jew. While I realize this isn't much of a bases for a successful relationship, it's enough for two individuals not looking to settle down and have babies and white picket fences. Anyway, we get to his place, Chloe carves my friend Elvis a pumpkin for his birthday, and from there we head to Elvis' birthday show at the El bar.
It was great to see all the familiar faces I haven't seen in a while. Even though there was one 'minus a few teeth' face there I could live without seeing (or accidentally saying hi to, shit! and we hadn't spoken in over a year, fuck, why did I mess that all up?) But there was a new face there, gorgeous as could be (see above.) His band was from near Boston, and my god, what a babe. After some initial flirting, I went to go check with Chloe and Kyle, as they were sitting out back a good amount of the time. And, awesomely, they got along really well, enough to hook up and now spend time together, etc. etc., good for them.
So, my attempts on this gentleman seemed to be going somewhere until he dropped the girlfriend bomb. OUCH. Guys know all about this, when ya chat up some broad all night, things seem to be getting somewhere, then BAM-boyfriend bomb! It sucks. At least I got a kiss on the cheek and picked up for a goodbye.
So here's another classic example of the irony that is my love life. I manage to hook up two stranger and they right away hit it off and begin to blossom into what can become quite the relationship. But, of course I go looking for the smallest bit of male affection for at least an evening, and he has a girlfriend (and he's not a cheater I might add, which is a good thing, though that hadn't stopped several men in my life before.) I go for these impossible men, even though they don't seem impossible at the time. They're all impossible... is it really so much to ask for a hot guy with side burns and a leather jacket? I assume it is, because I never manage to find anyone. Okay, I'll quit my bitching now and just remind myself that it's all my fault. I just have to be the pickiest person I know. Oy.
Next amount of big news is I got my license. It feels pretty amazing not having to depend on anyone for rides anymore. But, now I'm forced to find a job, which feels nearly unfeasible at this point. I hate job hunting, and for the past year, no matter how many applications I fill out and interviews I do, I fail at getting one... or keeping one. None of my jobs this past year have lasted longer than 3 months. Hell, I lost my last one in 2 days. Go me. I suck at work. How is it I was born into a Jewish family with two carpenter parents, and yet I have no work ethic outside of my scholarly pursuits? (Mind you, that took 17 years for me to get.)
Moving on... I just finished my classes for becoming an ESL tutor. I haven't told many people about this, I don't really know why. I guess because I figured nothing would come of it. But now I have to begin teaching English next week to some dude from Tajikistan. I mean, this will be a good experience if I do decide to join the Peace Corps or attempt to get a job overseas, but I donno. My whole thing with the Peace Corps was just a thought and then my mother went gung-ho about it. Not that I don't wanna do it, I just don't like massive encouragement because then others build these expectations and put this unnecessary pressure on you even if it's meant to be supportive. This goes along with my idea of not discussing my ideas. I hate being apparently "smart" and having to live up to these standards. Maybe if I was average no one would expect shit, and I wouldn't go crazy all the time.
I need to get my Adderall and my 5-HTP, that combination motivates me. It also makes me not eat, which is a huge benefit. I don't care what this says about me, I'll take the artificial if it means I'll get things done and feel better in a quicker amount of time. I've been a waste the last year, and I'd like to get a move on to doing and being something meaningful in this shitty little world.
Toughness runs in this family.
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