Back Up On It

I'm a little irked with myself for not posting anything for like, 2 weeks. I don't have any excuse except that I'm lazy. I need to get back on the accomplishment track, and I consider writing on here one big accomplishment. I can't call myself a writer and not write.

Halloween was fun. Saw the Tough Shits, got real drunk, got a chance to hang out with Joy alot... all an all, a damned decent evening. Joy actually wants to start a band, and asked me to sing. That's something to look forward to. I did end up spending way too much money, but I have an excuse. Ya know, halloween, holiest of holidays. Hopefully though, all my job hunting will pay off and I can afford to spend some money. I hate having to depend on my mother, but she knows I'm trying and not just sitting on my ass waiting for something to be handed to me. Anyway...

I've come to the realization I've forgotten how to go about kissing a boy sober. It's difficult even when I'm drunk and they're sober. I'm aware of how stupid this all sounds, but drunken behaviors are (almost/sometimes) forgivable. When you're drunk, you're allowed some leeway with your stupid actions. "Oh man! Did I really try to kiss you the other night? That's funny!" When both or one of you isn't drunk, it just becomes awkward. I guess this is why most of my relationships fail. They're all mainly based off of basic animal attraction, i.e., we just wanna have sex, and alcohol destroys and bit of awkwardness that naughty fun time holds when 2 people aren't in love.

I don't have much more to say, which sucks. I want to say more, but I feel brain dead. I'm on a bit of a lull right now, hoping to catch another spark. I always say "one of these days," and I need to start making that day today. Maybe I should cover my room with cheesy inspirational posters... boost moral every single morning.